When Everything Feels Uncertain: How a Therapist in Wakefield Can Help You Find Solid Ground

Struggling to navigate uncertainty? You are not alone, learn how a therapist in Wakefield can help

Uncertainty has a way of sneaking into nearly every corner of life. Sometimes it arrives quietly—like a lingering question about the future of a job or relationship. Other times, it comes crashing in, turning everything upside down with a sudden change, loss, or transition.

Either way, when life feels unpredictable, it can leave us feeling unmoored. Our bodies tighten, our thoughts race, and our sense of stability seems to vanish overnight. We might tell ourselves to “stay positive” or “go with the flow,” but the truth is, uncertainty is hard—because it touches something deeply human: our need for safety, meaning, and control.

As a therapist in Wakefield, I often meet with clients who feel caught between what was and what is not yet clear. Whether they’re navigating career transitions, health challenges, or a general sense that life isn’t as steady as it used to be, the feeling is often the same: “I just don’t know what’s next—and that terrifies me.” See my earlier blog introducing this topic.

If you’ve been in that place lately, you’re far from alone. Let’s explore why uncertainty shakes us so deeply, how it can affect your emotional landscape, and how therapy can help you find steadier ground—even when life feels anything but steady.

The Weight of Uncertainty: Why It Feels So Unsettling

Our brains are built to find safety in predictability. It’s part of our survival wiring—knowing what comes next helps us assess threat versus safety. When that predictability disappears, our brains will default to assuming there is threat or danger, in order to ensure we keep ourselves safe. Even if the uncertainty isn’t actually dangerous, our brain reacts as though it is, in a “just in case” manner of protecting us. It seems really kind, but can be maladaptive because not all change is actually dangerous.

Our brains enjoy knowing what to expect.
When we don’t know what’s coming, our brains fill in the gaps. They run through every possible “what if” scenario in an attempt to regain a sense of predictability and the safety that comes with it. The problem is that this mental rehearsal rarely leads to emotional peace. Instead, it keeps us stuck in a loop of worry, as if thinking harder might produce certainty.

Uncertainty magnifies “what if” thinking.
Many people describe uncertainty as mentally exhausting—and for good reason. Our minds are constantly scanning for solutions, replaying events, and imagining outcomes that may never happen. It’s an understandable effort to protect ourselves from the sense of risk inherent with the unknown, but if left unchecked, can lead to tremendous exhaustion, anxiety and simply to losing enjoyment of life.

Even good changes can feel unsafe.
Starting a new job, moving, or entering a new relationship can bring joy and opportunity. Yet even positive change comes with loss—the loss of the familiar. Our minds can’t always distinguish between uncertainty that we wanted for ourselves and that which actually hints at danger; it just feels the shift and reacts.

How therapy can help:
A therapist in Wakefield can help you recognize when uncertainty is activating old fears or stories you’ve carried about control, safety, or failure. By naming and understanding these reactions, you can begin to decide how you prefer to integrate this experience instead. Therapy creates space to slow down the mind’s rush to “fix” uncertainty and instead learn to live alongside it with more steadiness. For example, I saw a young woman in therapy who was struggling with her parents’ engagement, and lack thereof, with her new baby, as well as their judgement at times. On the surface, this seemed to be a fairly common dynamic associated with this major life transition, but she was extremely upset about it, losing sleep for nights and feeling disconnected from her life for days after a visit from her parents, which was highly undesirable. We were able to connect the dynamic to a period of time in her adolescence that her parents’ attention was more focused on a sibling with a challenging and chaotic disability and sadly, she felt very left out and highly unloved during this time. The current dynamic where her parents’ relationship with her baby was still uncertain (as it would be evolving over coming decades) activated a strong sense of danger for her, feeling like she could be neglected by her parents again and stuck with the horrible feelings that pervaded her adolescence with the challenging dynamic in her family at the time. Once she connected these dots, she was able to untangle her relationship with her parents from her child’s relationship with her parents, and trust that she would be consistent and loving and her own child would enjoy that, then she felt much more ease allowing her parents and child’s relationship to evolve naturally over time. Eliminating the sense of threat can be critical to enjoying the present time.

Common Situations That Stir Up Uncertainty

Uncertainty shows up in many forms—some obvious, some subtle. It doesn’t always require a crisis to knock us off balance; even everyday transitions can quietly erode our sense of stability.

Life transitions.
Starting or leaving a job, moving to a new town, or ending a chapter of your education can all spark questions about who you are and where you’re headed. It’s normal to grieve the version of yourself tied to what you have known, especially when you do not know yet how you will continue to evolve.

Health or caregiving challenges.
Illness, recovery, or caring for someone who’s struggling can pull the ground out from under you. The unpredictability of how things might unfold can feel emotionally—and physically—draining.

The unknowns of adulthood.
Sometimes uncertainty is less about one big event and more about the slow unfolding of questions: Am I where I thought I’d be by now? Is this career right for me? What does “happy” even mean at this stage of life? Do I go out enough? Am I comfortable enough being alone? These quiet uncertainties can linger for years, especially in times of transition.

World and community shifts.
Global issues, societal changes, or even the pace of life in your own community can stir up unease. When the world feels unstable, it’s easy to internalize that instability and feel like your footing is slipping too.

Whatever the cause, uncertainty often feels bigger than the specific situation—it becomes a full-body experience that colors how we think, feel, and connect with others. One area of life being uncertain can make it feel like everything around us is tinged with unpredictability and unreliability, magnifying our associated distress.

How Uncertainty Shows Up Emotionally and Physically

If you’ve ever found yourself unable to focus, sleep, or relax during uncertain times, you’re not imagining it and you are not alone! It can show up in many ways, such as:

Emotionally, uncertainty often brings waves of anxiety, frustration, and grief. You might feel stuck—wanting to take action but unsure what to do. Or maybe you feel like you’re treading water, waiting for clarity that never quite comes.

Physically, uncertainty can cause restlessness, muscle tension, headaches, fatigue, and changes in sleep or appetite as well as significant changes in bathroom patterns and comfort.

Cognitively, you may notice mental loops of overthinking or second-guessing decisions. This “analysis paralysis” is your brain’s attempt to find safety through control. Unfortunately, getting caught in analysis often leads to more analysis, instead of more comfort.

Socially, many people pull back when they’re unsure of themselves. You might avoid talking about what’s happening because you don’t want to sound negative or burden others. Over time, this isolation can make uncertainty even harder to manage.

Therapy helps connect the dots between what’s happening internally and externally. A therapist can help you understand how your mind and body are responding, and more importantly, help you regulate those reactions so they feel less consuming.

How Therapy in Wakefield Can Help You Reclaim Stability

Uncertainty can make it feel like you’ve lost your internal compass. Therapy helps you find it again—not by eliminating uncertainty, but by strengthening your ability and your trust in yourself to navigate it.

Building emotional awareness.
Therapy gives you opportunities to explore what uncertainty brings up for you specifically. For one person, uncertainty might trigger fears of losing control; for another, it might stir feelings of inadequacy or grief. Understanding your unique response helps you respond more compassionately to yourself.

Grounding in the present moment.
A therapist in Wakefield can help you learn mindfulness and grounding practices to anchor yourself when the future feels foggy. Sometimes, simply noticing your breath, how quickly or slowly you are moving, or the sounds around you can remind your body that you are safe right now—even if your mind is racing ahead.

Developing strategies.
Together, you can build practical tools for tolerating uncertainty without spiraling into worry. This might include relaxation techniques, reframing negative thought patterns, or setting boundaries around information intake (like limiting doomscrolling or news exposure).

Reconnecting with values.
When everything feels unstable, therapy helps you return to what matters most. Making choices based on your values—rather than fear—creates a sense of direction even when the path ahead isn’t clear.

Small Anchors: Everyday Practices for When Life Feels Unstable

Not all stability has to come from big, sweeping changes. In fact, the most effective grounding often comes from small, repeated acts of care.

Create steady rituals.
Simple routines can help restore a sense of rhythm. Maybe it’s making your morning coffee slowly instead of rushing, or taking a short walk every day at the same time. Maybe it’s noticing that when you brush your teeth every day, you are simply present in those short minutes without any other agenda. These moments remind your brain that not everything is changing—some things remain familiar and steady.

Limit uncertainty exposure.
Notice how often you invite uncertainty into your day inadvertently. If scrolling through the news or social media leaves you feeling tense or hopeless, give yourself permission to step away. If talking to a certain person heightens your anxiety and sense of doom, consider limiting contact or guiding your conversation more assertively than you usually might. Reducing unnecessary input helps create more emotional bandwidth for what you can actually control.

Name what’s still steady.
Write down or reflect on what hasn’t changed: your strengths, relationships, values, or daily practices. In uncertain times, it’s easy to lose sight of what’s still solid beneath your feet. Maybe it’s not any of these large principles, but in the old adage that “the sun always rises”, as there is profound predictability in many natural phenomena.

Practice compassionate patience.
You don’t have to rush through uncertainty. Sometimes clarity comes slowly, like dawn light inching across the horizon. Allow yourself to move at your own pace. Remind yourself: it’s possible to live meaningfully even while things feel unresolved.

Find grounding through connection.
Whether it’s therapy, a trusted friend, or an online community, connection itself is grounding. Being seen and heard helps you settle. Having community is soothing to a brain that finds safety in numbers. You don’t have to have answers to deserve support.

You Don’t Have to Face Uncertainty Alone

Uncertainty is uncomfortable—but it’s also a universal part of being alive. Everyone, at some point, faces seasons where life doesn’t make sense, where clarity feels far away, and where confidence feels just out of reach.

The truth is, uncertainty doesn’t mean you’re lost. It means you’re in motion. It means something is shifting, unfolding, or evolving—often in ways that can’t be seen yet.

Working with a therapist in Wakefield can help you steady yourself in the middle of that motion. Therapy isn’t about making everything predictable—it’s about helping you trust yourself enough to handle the unpredictable.

In the end, uncertainty doesn’t have to define you. It can become the very ground where resilience, wisdom, and deeper self-understanding take root.

Michelle Butman Collins, LICSW, is a therapist in Wakefield, MA, who provides in-person and online therapy for adults and young adults in Massachusetts, Connecticut, and Vermont. She helps people navigate life transitions, manage uncertainty, and reconnect with a sense of fulfillment and ease. Michelle also specializes in supporting caregivers and helping clients improve sleep through CBT-I. Her approach invites curiosity, compassion, and courage—because she believes therapy is serious work, deeply connecting and wildly fulfilling.